Friday

I came down with an annoying cold late Wednesday night, feeling those depths of fidgety malaise that always herald this sort of thing. It also seemed monstrously cold in our hotel room, something I credit more to my sickening perception than the actual climate. I didn't think much of these symptoms at the time, but by Thursday morning I was nearly bedridden. Luckily, I'm in the sort of seaside paradise nineteenth century doctors routinely prescribed to their ailing clientele. Also, I'm free to do nothing all day long. For Sunshine it's different: she's here to see gala events, sure, but she's also volunteering her vacation time to the pageant. She's been working twelve-hour shifts almost daily, helping the Miss Universe staff by stocking dressing rooms, herding Beauty Queens from one interview to another, troubleshooting language-barrier problems between the Universe staff and Vietnamese-speaking caterers and choreographers and whatnot. I've been dividing my time between gazing over the South China Sea and rereading Treasure Island. She's been working hard--meeting co-emcee Jerry Springer, making friends with the current Miss Venezuela, Dayana Mendoza, and generally accruing wads of typically hilarious anecdotal material. Having done nothing, then, I must either discuss Treasure Island or Miss Universe things from last month. Back at the Miss Universe National Contest,¹ we noticed Miss Kosovo was wearing a sash reading "Kosova". Did you notice this?² We started theorizing about how, like many countries, Việt Nam did not yet recognize the sovereignty of the newest little nation in the world.³ Indeed, Zana Krasniqi was announced at that very event as "Miss Serbia-Kosovo." Was her sash indicative of the red tape hoops Kosovar nationals must now navigate for their Vietnamese visa? Nah, it was just a typo. What contrived geopolitical conspiracy might we have imagined for "Miss Phillippines"?⁴ [Cavin]